One thing I constantly justify is being able to have control over my life. I justify that with so many reasons (i.e it's my life, I should decide for myself what's good for me, how can I trust in another being that everything will be okay? etc.) Little did I realize, just because I can justify my reasons for something doesn't eliminate the error.
I come from a society where control equates to power. A lot of us do. Most of us do. Control over your family's financial stability, emotions, health, well-being, happiness, decisions -- we as humans like to be in control. Being in control essentially means, you've got it figured out. Losing control on the other hand is a sign of weakness. So it's not unfamiliar territory I'm reaching here when I say relinquishing control is one of the hardest things to ask of anyone, let alone a Christian. And I don't mean relinquishing control in one area of your life, but leaving things to God in all areas of your life.
I admitted this to God tonight: I'm afraid that my intentions for certain things are for the wrong reasons. I'm not sure of what to go, which path to take, which decision to make. God, if you're real, reveal yourself to me for tonight and help me figure out the right thing to do. And as I sat there in RUF, Billy read a passage from Romans and shared what it meant for us to be a living sacrifice. He shared that while in some areas we leave everything up to God because we feel comfortable doing so, there are some areas in which we make up our own rules.
God has answered my prayer and was speaking through Billy. Am I making my own rules when it comes to school? Extracurriculars? Do I do everything with God in mind? Or do I make up my own rules for certain things because they mean more much to me as a human, and by greed and selfishness I am failing to give that up? Would I feel comfortable giving up certain things for God, or do I prioritize things so that they, instead of God, become my life?
We are always faced with tough decisions. As my friend told me today, God has the power to change whatever it is that we may have planned for days and months in a split second. We need to trust him and put our faith in him, because he knows what's up and he'll take care of us. As my favorite Bible verse says (God spoke to me through this verse upon my decision to renew my faith):
For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord.
They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.
- Jeremiah 29:11-12
Steps to relinquish control:
1. Pray that you be genuine and glorify God in what you do:
If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.
2. Trust that God has a plan for you:
For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord.
AND THEN LET GO.
Relinquish control.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. (Romans 8:28)
I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? (Psalm 56:4)
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6)
The greedy stir up conflict, but those who trust in the LORD will prosper.
Those who trust in themselves are fools, but those who walk in wisdom are kept safe (Proverbs 28:25-26)
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present all your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Phillippians 4:6-7)
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